Atmosphere: Wine country pub

Clientele: Couples, winery workers, Australians

Spirits: Full bar with drink specials

Staff: Depends on who’s working

The best thing about pubs is that sometimes you get to meet authentically Irish (my favorite) and English men there. While I was sad to hear that the local Irish never set their dainty Paddy toes into Patterson’s (located at 9057 Windsor Rd, Windsor), I was delighted to find out that it is frequented by Australians, who definitely make my fetish list of Hot Foreign Guys with Sexy Accents. (Are you a Hot Foreign Guy with a Sexy Accent? EMAIL ME NorthBayBarfly (at) Gmail (dot) com)

But I digress…Patterson’s is a great place to eat. They have a new chef, so if you’ve previously heard unpleasant things about the food, I can assure you that it’s been taken care of. I highly recommend that you forgo the french fries for potato salad if you are at all a potato salad fan. Check out my insane burger.

There’s a lot of seating at the bar and at tables so it’s a good place for groups. It’s brightly lit and welcoming, not dark and scary like some pubs. There’s lots of retro import beer advertisements on the walls to keep you entertained while your date is in the bathroom. Which, as an aside, can I just tell you how blown away I am by the hand dryers in the very clean and well-stocked bathrooms? Literally blown away. As in they may have taken the engines out of lear jets for use in these hand dryers, which are the first ones I’ve used where I haven’t had to dry my hands on my pants after rubbing them together under a gentle zephyr for 12 minutes.

But back to the bar… Kathleen is our bartender of choice, so try to go when she’s there and make sure you tip well, you cheap bastards. There are nightly drink specials, food specials and a very nice happy hour (4-5:30 pm) that includes $5 appetizers (hooray for food specials!) and discounted drinks including Irish Car Bombs. Speaking of which, when we were in there on Thursday night, the Bushmill’s/Guinness girls were there. Awww…look how cute! They’ll be back on the night of  Sept. 24th (also appearing at John Barleycorn’s in SR that night) and are offering cheap Car Bombs and giving away free shit (we love free shit) …

Unfortunately, I’m a Jameson’s girl myself…

Patterson’s has 21 beers on tap, multiple HDTV’s for all of your sports viewing needs and an extensive local wine list. They also serve breakfast and brunch in addition to lunch and dinner with both indoor and outdoor seating. There’s ample parking (try not to scratch the multiple yellow Corvettes in the parking lot). Really, I can’t see why you’d go anywhere else if you are in the Windsor area.

The soft glow of electric sex at Patterson's Pub

Pros:

Parking

Food and drink specials daily

Clean bathrooms

Australians

Cons:

Can get loud